making albuqueque

she's home, she's home, she's home

They let her out on Friday evening. She's home.

Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers.

Bella is now in the plateau phase of Guillan-Barre. She's likely to be the same as she is now for another week or so, hopefully no longer. At the moment she can walk holding on to my hands, feed herself, and get herself into crawling position and crawl with some strong encouragement. She's as cranky as all get out (irritability being one of the symptoms of the GBS). I suspect that most of that comes from extreme frustration. It must be difficult being little miss Independent and then suddenly not able to do things for yourself and get to places you want to go.

She's off childcare until she's able to walk on her own. I wont be comfortable to send her until she can get about by her own steam. I think she's a higher accident risk until she can, plus she cranks about something every five minutes, which is not pleasant for anyone. So I have to see my boss this morning to sort out something over the next couple of weeks. Thankfully this one is nothing like the last one, he's been absolutely fantastic about it all.

Oh, and the interview that I had while Bella was still in the high dependency unit....I got the job. So I need to negotiate with my current boss an end date and some goals to reach by then.

Keep up those wishes and prayers. We've still got a long way to go in Bella's recovery.

continues on the improve

So another good day today. Bella has been walking just holding onto my hands. She's taken a couple of steps unaided, but is very unkeen to do that. She's ultra wobbly, just like a new walker, and needs the added balance of holding on. What we need to do now, being as how she's in the plateau phase of Guillan-Barre, is to improve her confidence with what she can do, and encourage her to extend herself. Get her confident walking holding onto something other than me, encourage her to kneel down and reach down to the floor for things. The speech pathologist also assessed her swallowing today and it's fine apparently. So some of the coughing during eating and drinking is a confidence thing and the fact that one of the symptoms of GBS is altered sensation. We're marking time at the moment. However, everyone thinks she's doing really, really well, and if all continues to go well, we may be able to bring her home tomorrow.

We've still got a long way to go, but given how bad things could have gotten, Bella has gotten off very lightly.

back on the wards

So today was a much better day. Bella had a reasonable night, some disturbance but able to be resettled relatively quickly (I don't think the emergency with another one of the kids in HDU helped). When the first lot of doctors came round this morning they withdrew the threat of the nasogastric tube. Bella has been tolerating thickened cows milk to drink and eating some semisolid food. So hooray, the day was already looking up.

She also wanted to be held standing up...a lot, and took several little walks (very heavily supported and don't my arms know it). She's been able to sit in a chair, and this afternoon managed to crawl on her own. All in all a much, much more positive day. If she continues to improve then there is a slight possibility we may be able to bring her home on Friday. They wont guarantee that though.

Tomorrow we've got visits from the speech pathologists (to assess her swallowing capability). I'd really like to be able to give her something else to drink than the thickened milk because today she ended up drinking so much milk she didn't have any room for dinner. We should also get visits from the physios and OTs to start talking about what we'll need to do to help her recover.

Keep her in you thoughts and prayers.

Oh and that job interview I had yesterday (talk about brilliant timing) was a fairly surreal experience. They asked some questions about my skills and experience, but they were also sounding me out for more environmental things (like do I mind sharing an office, do I mind spending most of my day at the computer, will I be upset if there is limited travel involved in this job). The short answers are yes please, no and I have a small child. That said, I'm pretty sure I didn't get it because I haven't heard anything yet, and they usually get back to your pretty promptly.

Doing OK

Bella is still in high dependency, but doing OK. She got diagnosed on Saturday with Guillain-Barre Syndrome. The stuff you might read on the net is pretty harrowing, but she's apparently a mild case. She still can move her legs a little, can roll around the bed, and feed herself, which are all good signs. At the moment we're in a wait and see mode to see whether she will have to have a nasogastric tube. It depends on how well she is drinking and eating. If her swallowing gets compromised at all then it's the tube.

From what I can tell, we're looking at somewhere between 6 weeks and 6 months recovery time, but no one can really say for sure.

Bella in hospital

Sorry not a cheery post. Bella was admitted to hospital on Friday. She's been getting gradually weaker, more lethargic and wobbly on her legs for a week and a half. After a saga and a half through A&E and then ward admission on Friday, she got diagnosed with a post viral complication on Saturday. Basically you have a virus (in this case a very mild case of tonsillitis), your immune system gets confused and starts attaking your nerves. So at this stage she can't really bear any weight and her arms are pretty weak and uncoordinated. She started treatment last night to try and halt the process and give her body a chance to start rebuilding itself. She'll be in the high dependency unit for a couple of days to monitor her closely and make sure she doesn't get any worse, and then back on the paediatric wards for a week or so. We're taking it one day at a time at the moment, and our poor girl is sick to death of being poked and prodded. You've got to love her, even high as a kite on a sedative she was resisting with all her might when they were doing one of the tests.

So please keep our girl in your thoughts and prayers. She's going to be OK, but noone is saying how long it will take.

2 going on 13

I'm 5 days late on the birthday post, forgive me.

Bella at 2 exactly (well with a minute or two margin of error anyway).

Where on earth has the last 2 years gone. We now have a walking, talking, tantrumy, toddler. How could I ever have guessed two years ago how our little girl would be?

Perhaps I should have guessed in those early days. Back then she was sleep allergic, and incredibly alert, wouldn't fall asleep till she was dog tired, and needed a long wind-down time. Nothing has changed. She still likes to stickybeak, be up high and looking around, investigating how things feel, and smell, and look. She still takes a long time to wind-down, she'll still not go to sleep until dog tired. Those early days are oh so indicative of how Bella would be.

These two years have been some of the best and hardest of my whole life. The challenges of learning to be a parent, and specifically a parent to Bella were some of them hard learnt. I've still got a long way to go, but I think we're doing pretty well on parenting Bella so far.

 You're independent, and cheeky, and smart as all get out. You love to play marble runs, and kitchens, and playdough. You're a sticker fiend. You're obsessed with looking at all the flowers we see. You give us a running commentary on your day. And sometimes, you just want to lie quietly and read books to yourself. You are investigating things constantly, you speak better than any other 2 year old I know. I often have difficulties treating you as a 2 year old, because you speak so much better than one. I'm sorry Mummy's expectations are a bit high, I'm working on it.

Bella sweetie, you're the most delightful little person and I'd never hand back a second of the last two years.

there and back again

Sorry I haven't written about our amazing trip back to Aus before now. We've both been struggling with homesickness, and Bella hasn't been well or happy either. So rather than depress myself writing about the trip, here's a photo essay.

This photo pretty much says it all about our trip

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Add in some of this

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.And a little of this

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with a side order of (photos blatantly stolen from my brother)

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Take a little of that

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and a sprinkle of

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and you end up with three very happy ex-pats

Flying Long Haul with a Toddler - it's not really a nightmare, honest

So I have so much to say about our wonderful 3 weeks in Australia, but I'm jetlagged and heartsick at being back at work without Bella, so instead I'm going to list my tips and tricks for flying long-haul with a toddler that doesn't have their own seat.

• Assume it will be a complete nightmare.

This is essential. If you assume the flight will be a complete, and utter disastrous nightmare, then anything better than that will seem like a walk in the park.

• Check in Early

Yes, this does seem like odd advice, but I prefer not to be rushed when checking in and getting through passport control and security. It's bad enough doing that without a bored almost 2 year old, but exponentially worse with one in tow. Check in early, ask for a seat next to you to be blocked (it didn't work for us, all our flights were full, but it's always worth asking). Always ask for the seats with the bassinets/sky cots. Even if you don't use the bassinette there is extra leg room in this row and you get your meal first too. If you get there early you will be more likely to get these seats, and get them near the front of economy so you can get off the plane quicker. This is important.

• Let the kid run

Once you've gotten through all that passport control and security screening business let your kid run around in the transit lounge. They're going to have an awfully long time stuck on your lap, or in the cot, and doing laps of the aisle at a toddler run wears thin pretty quickly, so let them burn off the energy in the airport. Repeat every time you get off the plane. Let them run, tire them out, don't let them sleep while off the plane. Consider keeping them awake during normal nap times before you get on the plane so they'll be so exhausted they will fall asleep as soon as you take off.

• Flight time

Let's face it, there is no good time of day for your long haul flights. There are negatives to every option. Some people will tell you it's better to schedule flights to take off around nap times, or to arrive at a certain time of day. My thought is that it's going to suck whichever option you choose, so go with the cheapest flights with the minimum number of stops. If you arrive at your destination at night, then you can all fall straight into bed when you get there. If you arrive in the morning, you can limit the kid's day sleep that day so that they'll hopefully sleep well that night. Whatever you choose be prepared for the first couple of nights at your destination to be pretty horrendous.

• Nappies

Take more than you think you will need. Take enough to cover you for a horrendous episode of explosive diarrhoea and the first day in the new country. I've never used more than a quarter of the nappies I've packed but you know that the one time you pack light, will be the one time you really needed the extra and not all airlines will have stock to cover you.

• Food

Take snacks for your toddler, especially if you have a fussy eater. I don't have a fussy eater, but I still take extra snacks. The food they get served might not be appropriate for them, or they might be asleep during meal service. If you have snacks you don't need to worry about it. Good snacks to take are things that will occupy them for a while. Whole apples or pears are good if you have a toddler who is capable of eating them. Chunks of cheese are good. Apparently cheerios are good too. Also double and triple check with your airline what is contained in the toddler meals. On the flights out of London and Sydney Bella got food appropriate to her eating skills. On the flights out of Singapore she got mush, which she is well beyond. Also consider feeding them bananas in the day or two before you fly. Bananas have a binding effect on some babies and you really want to minimise having to change pooey nappies on the plane. If you've overdone the banana you can correct it with a dose of prunes at your desination. Also take a water bottle that wont spill for your kidlet. They probably wont drink as much as they should on the plane, but you still need to make sure they have access to water.

• Toys

What you pack to entertain your toddler is vital to a stress free trip. You may be given a pack for them on the plane, you may not. It is likely if you are given the kiddy pack that it will entertain them for about 5 minutes. Five minutes is not very long in a 24 hour period. You will need more than this. There are a lot of things to consider when packing toys and books for the flight. I read a lot about what to take before we left, and ended up taking more than we needed, but was still glad I had new things in reserve in case Bella got really bored. Here's a quick pick list of things to consider

• play dough - DON'T DO IT. Someone pointed out to me that it looks somewhat like plastic explosive, so leave it behind. Besides which it stinks and it makes a mess so it's not a good option on the plane
• Stickers - stickers are the be all and end all for us and Bella. Stickers will occupy her for a good hour if not more. Pack a small exercise book and shitloads of stickers and let them sit on your lap and go for it. They are small, cheap, noise free, and excellent for practicing fine motor skills anyway. On our last leg coming back we even shared our stickers with the 21 month old in the next seat, for which her parents were very grateful. I'll say it once I'll say it a thousand times, you cannot pack too many stickers
• An old favourite. If your toddler has a favourite toy, particularly if they sleep with that toy, then take it on the plane. It's got to be confusing enough for the poor kid, make sure they have whatever comfort they need. The same goes for special blankies if your kid has a special blanky. Hang the bulk, take the blanket.
• Things they haven't seen before. Go wild in your local pound or $2 shop. Pick up some cheap things like toy cars or balls or dolls or whatever. If it's cheap you wont mind losing it, and things they haven't seen before might occupy them for a few minutes more than you expect
• Books. Hide their favourite book a month before you go. It'll be that much more special for them when you pull it out on the plane. Also pack a new book. We got a Mr Men pocket library of 6 tiny board books at the airport which was brilliant. It occupied Bella for ages pulling them out, reading them, putting them back.
• Colouring. Take it, they might not do it, but it doesn't take up much space or weight so it's worth taking anyway.

• Attitude

Look no matter how good your kid is, people are going to assume they will be a complete nightmare. They will scowl when they realise they are sat near a toddler. There will be a combination of scowls and smiles when you're pacing the aisles with them. People will assume that your kid will be screaming and creating havoc, so just let it wash over you and get on with entertaining your little mite.

• Bassinettes

Try and get the seat with the bassinette. Your child may be above the weight limit, but they may not. Bella was almost 2 when we flew and she was under the QANTAS weight limit so we got good use of the bassinette. She was way too long, but she slept pretty well in there anyway. It was also good for sitting her in there to play for a while and she really enjoyed being higher up and looking around.

• Take-off and Landing

This is really important, dont' ignore this bit. Make sure your toddler is sucking something on take-off and landing. You know how your ears hurt when you are taking off and landing, and  you know how you know tricks to fix it? Your toddler doesn't. All they know is that their ears are hurting and it wont go away. If you are still breastfeeding, then time a feed for take-off and landing. I'm lucky, Bella will never refuse boob, so it was a handy tool for us. If you're not breastfeeding, then a bottle of milk or water can work, or a dummy if your kid likes a dummy. Whatever method you use, it's fairly vital that they are sucking at this point.

For this reason also make sure you pack a painkiller for them. You can buy those single serve sachets of Calpol in the UK, which wont violate liquid restrictions. They're good.

• Pram -vs- Baby Carrier (oh and a bit about car seats)

I think I need to put a proviso on this section. Everything else should be applicable across the board, but this is based on us travelling with a single toddler, who is very small (almost 2, and only 10kg or 23lb), independent, and a huge stickybeak. In normal life she'll spend about 20 minutes in a buggy before she gets bored and wants out, she would prefer to walk, and when she's not comfortable doing that, be carried up high so she can see what's going on.

So with that proviso, we chose the Baby Carrier option. We went with a Toddler Patapum (www.patapum.com). It's like an Ergo or Pikkolo carrier but it's got a longer back, and is rated to carry heavier weights, so is good for toddlers.

Things to consider when choosing whether to take a pram or not are -

• can you beg, borrow, steal, or hire one where you are going?
• How much walking around will you be doing? If you've got a heavy baby, or back or other health issues that mean you can't carry them for long, then pram is the better option.
• How much other luggage have you got? Think about the number of hands you have. Are you travelling with backpacks or suitcases? Who will be carrying what? Will you have spare hands to push a buggy, or are you both carrying backpacks and therefore need the kid in a pram?
• Can you take your pram as carry on luggage? Apparently Quinny Zapps, and QuickSmart traveller prams can be taken on as carry ons.
• Does your kid prefer the pram or the carrier, ours prefers the carrier 9 times out of 10, and even when she chose pram, ended up being carried by us for 75% of the time anyway. Your mileage may vary.

So for us the carrier was the only option. We needed her confined and close during airport transitions. And we were travelling to stay with rellies on farms, so would not have much need of a pram.

Now the bit about car seats. If your toddler has their own seat on the plane, then apparently the safest way for them to travel is in a car seat. This is all well and good, but don't then assume that you will be able to use that car seat at your destination. The only car seats that are legal for use in Australia are Australian car seats. So while it seems like a good idea at the time to take the car seat with you if you will be hiring a car, it's actually dead weight when travelling to Australia. You can hire car seats really cheaply in most places, sometimes from car hire companies, sometimes from third parties, so look into that before you go.

two more sleeps

So we fly out in 2 days. I have managed to edit the hundreds and hundreds of photos of Bella's life into a single photo album. I have not finished sewing the sock animals for my neices. I have not finished the washing, nor have I even started packing. I have started making a list of what to pack. Said list is not set in stone, because I fully expect to be randomly throwing things in the suitcase at midnight on Friday.

The list of things to pack for Bella may also need to change. She wears cloth nappies most of the time, but when travelling she's in icky disposables. Up until yesterday when I put her in disposables in the day, I'd been considering moving her up to 18-23 month size trousers, because the 12-18 months were getting snug on the bum. Put the disposables on, and now her 12-18 month trousers wont stay up and I'm tossing up whether to search out some 9-12 months! It's utterly ridiculous. There's a good 5-10cm extra space around the waist that I've somehow got to deal with. Yes, she's always been skinny, but this is ridiculous.

On another slightly amusing note....I've had Bella in normal singlets rather than popper vests this week. So for the first time in forever she's got complete access to her belly. The girl is obsessed. She'll walk around the house with her top pulled up rubbing her belly or pulling at her belly button. I wonder when the obsession will pass!

See that cardigan? That's the one she wouldn't even go near when I finished knitting it. Luckily I've made it way too big, so she'll be able to wear it next winter. Oh and all the accessories in the picture, girl chose them herself. Loving the accessories right now. I don't know where she gets that from, I'm not much of an accessoriser myself!

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And this is her first ever self portrait, albeit with very slight assistance from mummy. Not so bad for a first effort with a camera very sensitive to movement.

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One last recommendation. Trying to get everything ready for a big, international trip, with a toddler, when you have major PMS....not a recommended activity. Please, don't try it, it's not pleasant for anybody.

a week and a half to go

So we fly out in a week and a half. I can't wait. 3 weeks in Aus, family, yummy food, what's not to love?

Sorry for the blog blackout, busy, busy, busy around here. We've been running around doing last minute shopping, cleaning, dealing with a toddler who still hasn't adjusted to daylight savings time and just wants to be out and about walking all.the.frigging.time.

No photos today, again, sorry.

And Five Fruits is now up as a Ravelry download. If you are a knitter or crocheter and you haven't yet joined Ravelry then you really should. It's brilliant, and you can download the PDF of the Five Fruits pattern there. If you're not a joiner, then email me and I can send you the pdf.

Expect updates to be pretty patchy over the next month. We'll be busy up until we leave, and then we'll be dealing with a jetlagged sleep-resistant child. Any spare moments I get around that are firmly scheduled for sleep.